Sunday, 14 September 2014

The bridge of terror 100 word challange

Everyday I’d be laughed at, teased and mocked.
“Four eyes” They laughed.
“Freckle face” They teased.
“Red head” They mocked.
But this day was going to be different.
“Do It,” My ‘friends’ shouted AGAIN.
“Fine” I spat.
I walked down the bridge's end with my hair flowing beside me. I stopped, my breath fading and my body trembling with fear. I turned around to hide it but it was too late.
I jumped, screamed then opened my mouth with shock. The worst was happening, and no-one could stop it.

1 comment:

  1. The comment below was sent to me by the Team 100 member who had your number Violet. Unfortunately she does not have a google account so could not leave it herself. Can you add 'Name' to the drop down list so that anyone can comment? Also, please link the URL of the post, not your blog so that we can find the 100WC pieces. Thank you!
    Mrs Skinner

    Violet, I am assuming this is for this week's photo on 100wc. I read your other work and wow, you definitely have a talent for writing. Your choice of vocab is good, excellent in some cases. My only comment, to help, would be with regards to the punctuation. After speech marks you do not need a capital letter unless there is a full stop. Personally, I would have not included a full stop after each word at the end. I would have kept one word on each line - that worked well, but without a full stop I feel it would improve the flow. I very much enjoyed reading all the work and I hope someone comments on them for you. Well done and I really hope I get to read another of your posts soon. (Mrs C, Team 100)